A Beautiful Mess: At least I lived!

I hope everyone had a wonderful Christmas and happy New Years. Now that the partying is done, it's on with the year 2014. As I was reflecting on year 2013, I have to say it probably has been one of the most happy and fulfilling year for me. Not that everything in my life is all honky-dory by far, but you know when you have fought for something and have had dreams, and then you finally see some fruit after seasons of fighting and not seeing any reward at all, there is a feeling of joy and purpose.

Among the many dreams I've seen fulfilled this year, I would like to share one. Not that many people know that I have been struggling with my health the past few years. A few years ago I seemed to collapse under emotional and physical stress. I was in a depression and completely physically sick. This was discouraging to say the least. I slowly climbed out of that depression by letting people into my life and fighting with me. But that collapse set me back and I realized that physically I was still not back to normal. I had tightness in my chest and often struggled for breath. I had no energy and my bones (esp. ribs) kept popping out of place.

Now, I am a naturally active person. I love to jog, work out, play sports etc. But none of this was possible for me without me breaking down physically. I couldn't even run for a minute before I just grew completely out of breath, panting and holding my aching sides. This was extremely devestating to me. I felt like I was being robbed of my potential. I saw myself wasting away before my eyes.

I was generally getting better, but then I would fall back again with not being able to breathe deeply and lacking energy.

At the beginning of 2013, I decided if I wanted to live a happy life and succeed in all my other dreams, I would have to make it a priority to become healthy. And literally that was my goal for year 2013... to get to the bottom of my problem. I started pampering myself and taking life easy. Saying "no" to many things so that my body could rest and become strong. I started doing things that were fun and easy (I believe having fun brings healing faster). And yes, I went to doctors and chiropractors and started intentionally living a healthy lifestyle.

I did not have a major disease but after a time of not treating my body well and over stressing it was getting to the breaking point.

Then one happy day one brave person diagnosed me with scoliosis(crooked backbone). I knew I'd had a minor case of it since I was a child but it wasn't growing worse so I had forgotten about it. But apparrently it slowly was pulling my muscles and ribs out of place so much so that all the muscles in my back and chest area became so extremely tight that it caused all kinds of problems. Any type of twisting or pressure in the upper back made it worse. This was a happy day for me because finally I had the answer to my problems. Swimming is the treatment I got. This girl went swimming and then got massaged. Went swimming and got massaged some more. And I kid you not! After a couple months there was no scoliosis to be found.

And by the way, I have been running for 20 - 30 minutes already without almost dying. I have played active sports. No I am not completely up to where my body should be. I am still not doing anything strenuous with my upper back. I am taking in my vitamins to get my strength back up. But I can go for my jogs again. My brain has been clear for half a year already because since I can breathe deeply, I finally get enough oxygen to my brain again.

This is nothing short of a miracle for me! I plan that soon I will be able to actually vacuum again and clean the shower in my bathroom without it pulling out my muscles and ribs. I plan in the next year I will be able to do workouts and start gettin' those abs on. Oh how I miss using my muscle to their full potential. But I know this will be hard work and it will take lots of patience still. So I'll need you guys to keep me accountable. But then I did go swimming. And I hated swimming. Especially by myself. Cuz who's got time for that? Nobody else did apparently. But it paid off. And I will continue doing so cuz it feels so good.

Anyways, I hope this inspires you to not give up. And sometimes you just got to set your mind to get down and dirty to see the change you need in your life.

Here are some of my happy moments in 2013:

Above 3 Pictures: My Young Adults Group - '50's Swing Dancing. In the first one - learning the steps.
This group has been one of the joys of 2013.

PARIS! Check!

I had the privilege to go to Africa with an incredible fun team. We gave out clothes extravagantly and just hung out with the beautiful African people. Seriously I was struck with their beauty every time I looked into their fierce faces... dark eyes, high cheekbones, ebony skin and sparkling smiles. They are a kindhearted people.

Weddings - got to be a part of my 2 beautiful nieces' weddings!

Camp!

Makeup School...
This is my gorgeous model Jennifer. She is a smart talented young lady... As I've gotten to know her I know the world will need to watch out!

Editorial Shoot: This was my final project. Had fun playing with light, makeup and style.
Yvonne, another one of my beautiful talented friends. I love her motherly heart.